TheLoop21.com

By: Paul Mondesire (follow this member)
Tue, 03/10/2009 - 00:00

Some issues make us uncomfortable because they are so horrible that reasonable people back away, even from the thought.  The subject is the sexual abuse of children and to tell the truth, I hesitated to bring it up myself. Remaking America has thus far been a relentless cheerleader for good deeds and that won’t change, but this won't be an easy read today.

The vision of Just Tell is to see to it that “…children do not have to bear the scars of unrevealed and repeated abuse.” Vivian Farmery, founder and executive director of Just Tell, knew through her work as a clinical social worker (CSW) and as an education advocate in New York, that too many children felt they had nowhere to turn when confronting the painful echoes of these traumatic experiences. 

The numbers are staggering. Approximately 1 in 3 girls and 1 in 6 boys become the victims of sexual abuse by the age of 18.  Less than a third of them speak up about what happened, which is why and how Farmery believed she could have the greatest impact. She said “there are related social problems that are just too big for me to address as one person. I wanted to help lift the burden of guilt, shame, and self-blame imposed by the abuser from the shoulders of these children.”            

There are already organizations such as RAINN or Rape Abuse Incest National Network that do great work and offer services such as hotlines and resources for counseling, so Ms. Farmery chose to take a different approach. She had very little financial resources to make it happen, but she thought that if she could get young people involved, they could speak more easily with their peers and have a real stake in facing the challenge. 

Starting with her own LinkedIn network, she was able to put together a group of teen volunteers to do a focus group/workshop. Together they decided that the most important thing to do was to get the word out. The best ways to do that would involve using social networking sites like MySpace and instant messaging, and the traditional word of mouth. This combination of high-tech and no-tech techniques allowed Just Tell to get started without a tremendous infusion of cash. 

Next, an advisory group of teens and professionals was formed to decide on the look and the content of the website, as well as the MySpace page. The Just Tell logo was designed by one of the young people, along with the color schemes and original artwork featured on the site. The homepage simply says Kids and Adults which offers the right type information and guidance for each group. As for their MySpace page, they've had 48,000 hits since its launch two years ago. This exposure brought in a significant number of volunteers, both teens and adults, including thirteen professional videographers who wanted to offer their services pro bono for the effort. 

To handle face-to-face contact, the teens decided to establish street teams — groups of young people trained to discuss these very serious issues — and hand out Just Tell wallet cards that share basic information along with the website address. The teen volunteers are not professional counselors and are clear about their limitations. 

The most important piece of advice they give however, is to find an adult that the young person can trust, tell them what happened, and get the help they need. It is critical that every victim of abuse understands that they are not alone, and there are people that are looking out for them in their time of crisis.

Farmery was not terribly surprised to find out that several of the 40 or so adult volunteers were themselves the survivors of abuse. Many of them shared the same thought: “I wish Just Tell was around when I was a kid.” This means they are extremely dedicated to the cause and are willing to bring all types of skills to bear. The organization has received help for everything from legal and accounting work, to graphics, website design, and printing—all gratis or at a low cost. 

Next steps for Just Tell include producing an outreach video, and plans to have their street teams head out to select public events in the spring and summer of this year. By getting out among their friends and other young people, these dedicated youth volunteers can talk about this important problem, shining light into what has to feel like a dark and lonely place for the victim. 

If ‘knowledge is power’ then compassion guides the hand on the transmission. 

Should you believe in the work of Just Tell, don’t hesitate to make a donation so they can keep opening doors for those who need their help.

Paul Mondesire is a native New Yorker working in the non-profit arena. He has a passion for education, life-long learning and writes because he believes we must eliminate ignorance by any means necessary.